When You Accidentally Swipe Right
Why do you really swipe right? 7 things you didn’t know about digital dating
Insider knowledge from four leading dating experts…
15 million people are single in the UK right now, and around 50% of this number are looking to find love and a serious relationship. So if that’s the case then how come modern dating is still so damn hard?
We put this question to four dating industry experts last week during the Adweek talk: ‘Live for Passion: Dating in the Digital Age’, hosted by Marie Claire’s very own editor Trish Halpin.
Charly Lester, top dating blogger and founder of The Dating Awards, shared her own personal experiences of finding love online, while Happn’s head of Media Relations Marie Cosnard discussed the future of dating apps. Evolutionary anthropologist Dr Anna Machin brought her scientific perspective to the panel, also talking about her role as a matchmaker on Channel 4’s ‘Married At First Sight’, while Tim Samuels completed the panel with his humorous insights on the male view of online dating – Tim is a documentary filmmaker and recently wrote a book on modern men– Who Stole My Spear.
The panellists discussed the huge shift in behaviours, expectations and attitudes in the dating world over the last few years, and the monumental changes brought about by the explosion of apps and digital dating technology.
Here are 7 very useful points we took away with us…
‘We’re looking too hard for perfection’
According to Dr Machin and Tim Samuels we need to manage our expectations, with digital dating becoming an endless string of swiping left in search of unrealistic ‘perfection’ encouraged by sites like Instagram. ‘We have the attitude that “this person is great but maybe there’s someone better out there” which can be a problem’ Charly Lester explained.
‘We have more opportunity than ever for meeting people’ – but is it too much?
The panel argued that modern dating has actually given us too much choice. ‘Men are not great when we have too much choice’ explained Tim – likening the situation to being faced with more than 3 different types of jam at the supermarket, ‘we just get overwhelmed.’ Charly agreed, ‘dating sites have definitely broadened the net, but they have made us a lot more picky.’
‘Men and women approach the world of dating in completely different ways’
‘All mating behaviour is about making a baby and that hasn’t changed since we were primates unfortunately’ explained Dr Machin, but when we dig below the surface there are apparently real differences in what we look for. ‘Men look for signs of fertility’ she explained, someone who is young, curvy and with a good waist to hip ratio – all apparent signs of oestrogen circulation. Women however look for someone to protect and provide (we know, what a cliché), ‘looking for signs of wealth, athleticism and good genes for her child’ – even subconsciously looking for high facial symmetry on dating profiles.
Video: 30 vs 1: Dating App in Real Life
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